Wednesday, January 28, 2015

I'm Pivoting: out with the same old healthy living info, in with me on a soapbox wearing spandex.

Ok, so maybe you've seen that Friends episode where they're moving the couch and Ross (or is it Chandler?) is screaming, "PIVOT, PIVOT?" Every damn time I think of that word, that is where my mind goes. However, that pivot was so 1990s. This one is so modern and techie that I'm going to reference HBO's satire of the Googly Apple-verse known as Silicon Valley.

Anyways, in this scene the start-up company that the show is about has just realized that their exact business model has been replicated (and improved upon) by another company. One of the characters suggests that they pivot the concept of their business in order to salvage their dignity and the business itself the night before they present the product at a tech convention. (long story short they didn't have to because they came up with some incredible equation that had something to do with the amount of hand jobs that could potentially be given in an hour and thus resulting in an epiphany for the CEO). 

Basically, I am trying to do something here that someone else is already doing better. The internet is inundated with 'healthy living' blogs, and most of them are pretty similar. So if I am trying to stand out, I need an epic pivot. Telling people that in order to get in shape they need to exercise isn't new information, and the fact is my qualifications are pretty much based on turning myself into gym rat, experimenting with my own body and owning altogether too many pairs of stretchy pants.

 I have spent hours googling varied combinations of the words 'crossfit' 'female' 'lifting' 'lifestyle' 'fitness'  and 'blog'  and mostly what I find are paleo recipe sites, training programs, lifting/bodybuilding forums, and internet arguments about why the creator of Crossfit is fat and how many grams of protein you should eat in a day. While this is super fascinating and the cause for many a lost hour of my own productivity (lets call it research), it all just ends up running together in a giant blob of barbells, grass fed meat and whey protein.

So here's what I'm thinking.

I am an American who ended up living in Barcelona, Spain, partly by accident. I am a workout addict who eats paleo-ish, loves Crossfit, and is trying to figure out the whole Olympic lifting thing. I'm just a little music obsessed, need coffee to survive, and am always trying to figure out how I can eat more vegetables. I am a recovered chubster, converted vegetarian, and accomplished bullshitter. I thrive on sarcasm, almond butter, and sitting around too long in my sweaty gym clothes.

Instead of trying to convince people to start working out or eating better or reducing stress levels by giving them the same ideas they can find on websites written by actual professionals, how about I just share the shit I actually do know something about (my life, duh). Hopefully some of what I have to say will make you think, some will make you laugh, and some will motivate you to do good things for yourself and the people around you.

If not, at least you can tell your friends about the idiot you read about on the internet today.

Your friendly internet idiot.

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